August 8th, 2008
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password for previous post
pswrd: sad
it’s about my grieving friend.
the password is available cause i just don’t want the post to be that public and only for people who really want to read it. you can leave comments about it here if you want.
p.s: met up with him today and everything went very well actually. he was way stronger than anyone i know and was ready to talk about the accident. he talked about all the regrets he had, what a great person his mom was, and how their lives will change after this. he said he told me all that despite how painful it was cause he just really wanted me to appreciate people around me now cause you never know when they’ll go away =(
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i know how you feel right now and i feel sorry for your friend.just do whatever you can to help your friend.im sure he needs your support to go through all these.give him strength so that he could carry on.god bless him…
sorry on what happened to your friend..=(
i hope things will be fine soon.
*hugzz*
don’t blame urself too hard.
as much as cruel the reality is,things happen for a reason.
be there for him.be a good listener.heck,gv a shoulder for him to cry.
n the most important thing is,be a suet li,coz im sure dats wut ur best fren needs rite now.
smile.
Happened to my primary school best friend about her mother passed away. I couldn’t do much as I didn’t know where she living when the time happened.
I just knew because she told me on msn messager – I didn’t know what to say to her. I was at shock mode.
They all booked a ticket to travel to Norway included her mother before she passed away by a heart attack couple of weeks laters or so.
*sigh* … :’(
awww this is bad
i dont know what to say but.. cheer up
i had this friend, she lost someone she really really loved. for the whole year she felt like shit. she was just waiting for him to come back, from dead. also tried various ways to contact him, mediums n stuffs. to see if he was okay, not alive n being dead. but then after grieving for one whole year, some time after his 1st death anniversary, she woke up one day and felt better. understatement, like, she finally understood that he wasnt coming back.
moral of the story is, friends and loved ones can only guide them, make sure they dont fall n stuffs. but time heals, just be there for them. after some time, might not be in too soon, they’ll eventually get better. all u have to do is be there.
the end. hope that helped
i left kl to study abroad in feb this yr and my friend of 5-6 yrs lost her dad to a heart attack during one of his badminton games[leisure purpose] in march and her bday is in april. what a tragedy. tho i rarely met her dad[busy busy man], he’s a very friendly, super nice man. i dare say that he’s a loving dad. it kills me knowing that i cant be by her side.
–
since a couple of yrs back when i know i definitely will study abroad, i keep thinking bout my parents. the main q was what if they leave me alone? i know everyone will “go” one day but i seriously cant imagine how will i pull my life back together.
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i know there’s nth anyone of us can say to make u feel better.
this stuff hurts =( but rmbr to put a smile on that face of urs =)
I love you Suet
Suet, can I have the password please?
my uncle passed away more than a year ago and same as you, i did not know how to deal with this sitation at all.
i wished to be by my cousin’s side but i was so afraid that i would break down. i did not know what to do or what to say to make him feel better =(
me too was hurting inside because of the sudden death of my uncle. besides listening to him and asking him ‘how r u’ and stuff like that, i really do not know what to do
but i guess human will grow and learn by themselves. sometimes you just gotta let him get out of this on his own. All you need to do is let him know that you care. he would b able to feel it
don’t break down! Gambateh!!
awwwh mann… cheer up suet lee! (:
cheer up!
Bb the password is written in this post.
Hey suet. I get wht you mean girl.
I hate it when something like this happens, and i get this sense of helplessness. knowing tht whtever i do will not make things better. but i realised that sometimes it does. you’re there with him, that’s wht matters and tht’s wht will make a difference.
Sorry can I have the password? Thanks.
sorry to hear about your friend. as an orphan myself, I really know how he feels.
just be there for him. be a listener. I’m sure he’s sick of people telling him the same old thing every day — things will be alright, time will heal everything. talk about anything but that. he’ll appreciate it, like how I appreciated my friends when they did that.
and don’t blame yourself for not being a good friend. the fact that you felt that you weren’t being one shows otherwise
thanks everyone =) really appreciate your advices.
the password is in this post.
I feel the loss intensely because such things shouldnt happen but did. i dont know what to say, but i wish your friend will find courage in the memories and try very hard against the impossible to find that happiness he so deserves and shouldnt have lost. i really dont know what to say …but …i know how you feel.
such a loss is indescribable.few years ago, i lost 2 of my neighbor’s sons.we all grew up seeing each other grow.it was the day before raya.the family going back to kampung,in separate cars.the morning we already waved all of them off for the long holidays,then later in the afternoon i saw the two sons return home .i saw them through my window as i was just peering over..then few hours later my opposite neighbour’s son who was on the way back home,saw a horrific accident and recognized the car.thus,he called and informed the parents.my mum who was having a light nap was shocked when she got the call she immediately cried on the bed,my mum always have a soft spot for the eldest son,very kind and courteous.i myself was dumbfounded.it took me few days to digest the news,and i did cried so hard one night when the realization came upon me.even my parents and a few other neighbours travelled back to their hometown for the funeral,it was a sombre raya for all of us.few months went by,and my mum told me she had a dream.she saw the eldest son looking a lil down.dressed up in all white,in the dream my mum asked him why is he sad,he said he was lonely.the next morning,my mum told about the dream to my neighbor,and the aunty immediately held doa selamat for her 2 sons inviting all their friends to join.and we also learned that,the eldest son,uttered apologies to his parents before he drew last breath,while the younger son died on the spot.life is so unpredictable.so live for now.we all have to move forward.hugs**
and one more thing till this very day..i never forget the sight of them when i was peering over my window..it can not be erased.i learn to live with it,as the rest of the family members are still my neighbors.
*HuGzZz*
i lost my mother to cancer more than a decade ago. i was pretty young then so in a way it was easier to face it because i didn’t fully understand, but growing up then became difficult. i guess it works the other way around for your friend, who is already full grown, but because of that he then fully understands the impact of the situation and is having a more serious breakdown now. so i think he just needs to get through this phase, and it will take time.. he might never get over it even, but at least he knows no matter what he can stand on his own because of all his mom has already given him.
my little advice for you is probably to not repeat the same mistake again. never wait until the person is lost to appreciate him / her. never think there is always tomoro, there is always time, never. and the best way to cope with loss is prob to just be there with him, even if it’s helping him with house chores or asking him to yamcha / play basketball, just do stuff together and make sure he’s not alone in the house doing nothing. if he brings up the subject and seems like he wants to talk about the incident or the past, just listen and maybe sometimes if its possible point out some funny parts and laugh about it together. it may sometimes be forced, but i think ultimately it does make a difference
good luck
totally understand how it feels because i lost mine last year all of a sudden. the long flight home and being at work in a foriegn land adds on…
the best thing you can do is to check up on him, call him now and then and listen to him when he feels like talking. nothing could drown his sorrows, but he does know and feel others do care about him….
time would heal the wound, but be there to listen and give him courage.. even by just asking him to join your group for a movie or for coffee.
alright, enough of the sad stuff… so how are you with your mossie bites? maybe you should use that electrical mossie repelent thing that you put a blue slab of cookie looking thingamajig. smile~~
hey there. these things are inevitable. If that’s God’s will. all we gotta do is to appreciate those right in front of us. sigh. but i dont know if i am doing the same thing.
omg, and i didn’t find out about this going on until now 0____0
no suet, you didn’t fail as a friend. on the contrary, you went out there and looked for something, anything to help him.
i can understand the frustration because there isn’t anything concrete you can do to make them feel better. but believe me, just being there is the greatest help.
when i lost someone, all i remember is my friend saying: i don’t know what to say, but i just want you to know i am here.
sigh. you did all you could suet. your friend will look back and know he was loved and supported in his time of grief.