Feel Like Shit Day

Feel Like Shit Day

I’m having such a terrible day today and I just want to curl up on my bed and cry to sleep..except that I already had 9 hours of sleep so I can’t fall asleep again.

Sometimes I really wonder why I have to work so hard and get so little in return when it’s clearly not worth it at all. Case in point: my trash job. Is sorting through the trash and getting your hands and body so dirty worth whatever meager amount you get? I know I said I really don’t mind doing it because after all it’s an honest living and I don’t have to ask my parents for extra money but on days like today I really just want to puke my guts out, literally.

Maybe today is Let’s Throw ALL the Trash I Have Out Day because today is just…trash-bonanza day. Everyone clearly emptied their rooms out because the trash bins were overflowing with trash! And that’s not the worst part, the absolute worst part is 90% of the trash consisted of food..and not just any food, they were expired, uber gross, rotten food.

with freaking flies and maggots all over.

On days like this I really question my own integrity and principles as a human being. Do I really need to stoop that low to make a decent living? Do I really need to put my hands into that incredibly mangled party of maggots squirming around in glee and flies buzzing around in joy just so I can buy, say, another top from beststoreintheworld Forever 21?

I was alright at first although after I was done with one floor I already had a following of maybe 3,000 flies behind me. But then I got to the second floor, and realized that THIS floor decided that today is Throw Your Grossest Food Out Including Lots of Ketchup Day. By the time I got to the third floor, I had ketchup all over me and was ready to break down and cry my eyes out.

Did my parents pay that much just so I can get myself drenched in sweat and ketchup and flies buzzing around me and probably a maggot or two snugged somewhere I don’t want to know?

When I finally was done with getting all the trash bags out and putting fresh plastic bags in, I realized that at that precise moment in time, THE FUCKING ELEVATOR DECIDED THAT TODAY IT WILL TAKE A REST AND NOT WORK.

I was so close to breaking down at that point you have no freaking idea how hard it was for me to remain my composure and pretend that I’m strong enough to lug NINE extremely heavy and probably bigger than me bags down four flights of stairs.

After I was finally done with everything, I looked at myself in the mirror and I was in such an utter mess that I couldn’t even recognize myself. I still saw flies around me (don’t know if they were imaginary or real, probably the latter) and I swear I felt something wiggling around underneath my shirt.

I then went outside for some fresh air and to think about my life. Yeah, I cleverly decided that this was a good time to actually think about my future and what I want to do and the fact that I should look for a job right now and how my love life is in a bigger mess than my physical self.

photo

I went back in to shower and realized that my roommate had used my really expensive shower gel yet again. The 150ml bottle cost me $30 (long story short, she herself got it for me without telling me the price until after she got it fml) and I tried to not be petty before but right now all I had in mind was just WTF $30 I need to do 4 hours of trash to buy this bottle so whoever who used it without my permission will face my fists of fury!

Life, you really know when to kick me in the nuts don’t you?

This is why kids, you should study hard and not end up as a trash collector.