November 22nd, 2010
Happiness is a warm gun
Dear readers,
I sincerely apologize for the lackluster posts these days. I’ve been incredibly emotional lately about a myriad of things and I may have even appeared unhappy or sad or upset. Rest assured, I was anything but all that. I was broody yes, and I was contemplative, but I was nowhere near thinking that my life sucks balls.
Anywayyy, I realized that I’m actually not comfortable with sharing such a big part of my life online anymore. I get ill with ease at the thought of people I don’t know putting my life under the microscope for scrutiny. My stomach churns at the thought of people I know getting hurt by my utmost honest feelings because they didn’t want to acknowledge that before.
I can’t do this anymore. Thanks for reading so lovingly, so patiently, and so loyally for the last few years. Last many many years actually. I will still blog of course, but really, don’t expect anything like before. I’ve entered a new phase of my life where putting myself out there like an open book has proven to hurt myself and many people in my life.
It’s actually quite weird to think this way because I used to think that I have nothing to lose by parading myself in public like that. But I guess now this is a different ballgame altogether. I’m so tired of being afraid of people judging me when in actual fact, NO ONE has the right to even pass judgment about me when they don’t know the whole story. It’s, however, an inherent human nature to judge and I would be stupid to want to go around pointing fingers and shouting at people who do that.
So at the end of the day, I realized that if I don’t provide the source to all this, then it won’t happen and we’ll all be happy right? I go on my merry ways trying new exciting things without feeling like I need to justify myself to anyone, and you go on your own ways reading one less blog.
Isn’t it what it’s down to in the end? You get sad that you lost yet another honest blogger to the big scary world, you moan to your friends that people these days are so afraid of putting themselves out there anymore and that you wish more people will have the courage to do that, and then you shrug and say well I guess this is how the world is. Then a few days later, la la la, you chance upon another blog and you’ll forget all about me.
I sincerely with all my heart and soul do wish that I have the courage to just say fuck ya’ll fuck the world i’m just going to do whatever the hell I want and if you think my actions don’t subscribe to your rigidly-prescribed dogma or principles in life then go find another blog to read and leave me alone while I actually have a guilt-free life. peace out. But alas, I don’t, at least not right now.
So I guess that’s it for now. Thank you for all your time, thank you for all your kind words, and thank you for all your love. I’ve truly been extremely blessed. See you when I see you next.
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i feel the exact same way you do, at least based on your description in this entry alone. it’s a phase in life. some people encounter it early some, a lil later. insensitive people who judge are those who have gone through smooth sailing and the occasional downfall but not enough for them to be in this phase. start again and do whatever you need to. i just thought i should comment because i feel i can relate. all the best.
Hey as I am trekking thru traffic trying to assemble the pieces of my misplaced wallet back again, this is a most welcoming post for company. The phases of our lives is just what it is – a phase. There will always be circumstances, people and places that will shape us. Emotions will always be part of us- often bittersweet but that’s what they are … Experiences. And these are reasons to be thankful for no matter how overbearing they could be at times. Embrace them and LIVE. Don’t be too bogged down by the ways of the world,the judgment of others, fears of mediocrity or even guilt. Things will sort themselves out soon enough. HUGS!
Glad that you’ve found your new phase in life.
I think my next phase starts after 16th Dec, which marks the end of my STPM.
Don’t worry much about blogging less about your emotions and all.
As readers, we read whatever you write and not you writing what we want to read.
As long as it’s still written by you, I’m always here to read
All the best, suet
oh and i just followed your blog yesterday..
oh well, all the best to you, stay happy and pretty =)
all the best my just-found-and-now-lost-again fake twin sister!! much as i’d miss your openness with your life, it’s better to share your private life with people closest to you. think of me when you eat strawberries cos i’d definitely think of you when i sweat
you’re still fucking pretty <3
you’ll be missed T_T !! Goodluck Suet!!
Take care and all the best! We will wait fir you to back to blogging!
Many ppl will miss u more than me! But some of your posts and things you shared will always be in my memory. Have a fun life Suet Li! Hope to see u one day.
you will be missed!
i’ve enjoyed reading your blog.. no matter who you’ve become.. you are you..
life is not always of rainbows and cotton candies..
should you decide to voice your honest thoughts here again.. i’m sure many will continue to read and support u =)
Good luck with life!
See you in your next post, Suet! I hope it will be soon
God bless you!
it’s funny how i’m in the exact same state as you (the not wanting to share to the whole world like an open book), hence my lack of blogging these days.
okay suet! as much as it saddens me to read this post of yours, as a reader, i know i have to support you no matter what. and so, i shall wait for your next post. you’ll always be my favourite blogger! i know i’ll miss reading ur special and honest posts but if that’s what you want, i respect your decision..
hi suet li, thanks for writing for so long. it’s been a pleasure to read your blog. good luck with your senior year and hope to hear from you again!
now you have grown up…. welcome! haha.. no worries, everyone goes through this phase in life and i can guarantee that you are perfectly normal for wanting to blog less about your personal events.
i wish you well and keep on posting whenever you feel like it. smile always miss sunshine.
it’s sad to hear that you’re feeling this way, as i’ve always thought you were so amazing to be able to always write your honest thoughts and opinions no matter what others might say. but in the end, this blog is for you, not for other people. do what is best for you.
for those who like reading your blog for the way it shows what a genuine human being you are, they will continue to support your decisions, because they’re a reflection of you.
hey, i have been a silent reader for many years. your blog is amazing and not writing your personal life doesn’t mean that you are not honest.
may you be well, peaceful and happy
suet, cheer up, be happy k! lurvee ur blog *hugss*
Dun leave us ….. Shall be waiting !
You never ever have to justify yourself to anyone, that’s true. We just love to read your stories regardless it’s a happy story or otherwise. Your blog is the only blog around that reminds us that bloggers are human too and we have a sense of closeness to you.
It’s understandable that you have entered a new phase of life and you do not wish to share too much with us anymore. For that, we cannot demand you to share your personal stories with us anymore because we have no right to do so.
We love you and your words. At times, i feel like I’m reading amazing poetry here in your blog. I just wish the best for you and no, we will not find another blog and then forget about you because sweatlee.com had grown into a big part of our lives.
Don’t take me wrong. It’s perfectly right for you to share less of your personal life, but i hope that one day you will still be here, telling us how things have been going great for you coz we want you to be happy.
But for now, see you when i see you next. we will always be here, forever and ever!
im extremely saddened by this! but nevertheless, good luck in everything. well at least keep us posted on some non-controversial matters yea? that’s the thing with this society huh, people will want to have a say in everything, have opinions and comments. stay strong! we know you will be happy sweat again soon!!
I was always so scared to be judged that now i hardly blog too. I guess it’s better this way. But whatever it is, you still have a large fan base that love you for who you are, no matter what happens. It’s true that people don’t know what you’re going through, but it’s ok… you have people who don’t know what happened but still supported you all way. Ain’t that great? Shows that you have a remarkable personality thats well liked. =) We’re all growing up and inevitably, there will be tough moments for us but it’s all these moments that make life interesting. One day or so, we shall look back and say ‘ awww.. that was fun. I’m glad i went though it.’
Cheers. Have a great life yea !!! Enjoy it, embrace it !!
hey suet, been reading you since I can even remember when. Do hope this is not that end of it.
you had always been a great writer that I enjoy reading.
hey suet, this is only my second comment here even tho i’ve been reading this blog for quite a long time. i just want to say, i’ll really miss you – you’re not ‘just a blogger out there’; somehow, sometimes the stuff you write, its just really amazing and i can relate it in some way to my life.
i really love your blog for your originality and down to earth-ness. this not the end for sure
*hugs!!
awww, suet!
you will definitely be missed!
i really adore ur writing. sometimes even a simple random post can really make me smile.
all the best in your new phase of life. together we strive for the better life for us!
love always!
Hi Suet, I think you made the right decision. Maybe because I have been there before and have learned about human nature through the process, so I sort of know that you will probably arrive at this decision…it takes you quite long though haha. You owe no one any explanation as to how you lead your life and the choices you made, no one has the right to judge or criticize you. What’s important is to do what is the best for yourself, your loved ones and for those who sincerely care for you. Blog readers are just out for some entertainment and nothing is as interesting/gratifying as a “reality” blog. But all in all, you have left a deep impression in people’s heart for being who you are and you really are a very sweet and wonderful person, and life is what we make them to be, so just live and enjoy the roses along the way. Live for the moment, carpe diem!
I agree with yumii…
so..do take care.. i will not forget sweatlee.com
Good luck!
Every blogger goes through this phase of doubt, I have too. Your posts, emo or otherwise, have accompanied me as I go through life frustrations – as sadistic as it sounds, it’s somewhat comforting to know that someone out there is experiencing something vaguely similar. Thank you (:
in reference to a previous comment: If you knew me in real life, you’d know I’m almost too blur to ever be right but thanks haha (: what I typed then are probably words I wanted to tell myself lol you had probably thought along the same lines before. Similar words somehow get a lot more credibility when heard from someone else, that’s all heh. (:
I hope everything works out for u in the end. I have been reading your blog for quite awhile. I think since you appeared on Nuffnang’s monthly thingy. As the monthly blogger I mean. Haha.
hi suet, stay strong, and take care. feel sorry for your feelings.
i do enjoy reading your blog started one year ago and this is one of my favourite blog and i usually just look around blogs with lotsa photos, but your blog post always made me curious and eager to read from the beginning to the end, you’re very funny sometimes, and really love the way you blog! and of course i love your photos too, i mean….include the vain ones!~ you’re gorgeous and cool!
Goodluck!! All the best
you gonna b stronger n stronger.
Take care
kooochi-kuchi-kooooo!
Hi Suet =). I started reading your blog only two years ago and I truly love your writing style. It makes perfect sense to want to keep some things private. I think all your readers can agree you are definitely the most open and honest blogger out there. Through your words and your own view you make it easier for people to understand things about themselves. I agree with CCC that you help build vocabularies (as I’ve found myself many times clutching a dictionary while reading T_T). Even if you didn’t blog about personal stuff your blog would absolutely be worth the read. I love the poetic ways in which you express yourself. You are super bright, funny and adorable. *hugs*
Missing you and your smile already
All the best in life. Hope you would hop back for some updates
Hi Suet,
I love your blog. I usually don’t like to read people’s blogs, I find it dreary and dull- but yours is wonderful and charming and lovely, and I am sure that the real person is the same. I know that sometimes in life, we go through bumps which utterly suck out our souls, so I just want to say- do what you want, and take whatever time you need, because you have already been so wonderful to all your readers, for so long. All of us wish for your happiness and we support you whole heartedly. If you are not comfortable saying certain things, it is perfectly alright.
Anyway, I sincerely hope the best for you. I would never forget you, ever, and Im sure many people who have read your blog will feel the same. you are bright and wonderful and loved.
take care.
aih i also very emo like you………………..
Hey, I chanced upon ur blog just a few days ago and it has gotten me hooked! Found myself reading page after page, entry after entry… Even though u’ll be blogging less now, what matters is that u’re happy and ur readers will be happy for u
stay pretty and all the best!
thanks everyone
i’m glad this blog has been helpful and entertaining thus far for everyone!
enjoy the new you!!
i hope you will write again. gosh, i miss reading your blog a lot. hope you make a comeback ok? in the meantime, hope you’ll be okay. *hugs hugs*
awww! suet, we’ll miss u! truth be told, i’ve been reading your blog for two years now (wait, that sounds creepy!), as well as aud, su ann, and timothy’s. i think, you guys are the only malaysian bloggers that i constantly visit every now and then. every time i read your blog (and theirs too), i always find something new about malaysian culture, which is nice; but it is your individual unique personalities that make me read some more, among all things. i really enjoy reading asian blogs (because, uh, i am asian too)and i am here in states too (i’ve never met malaysians btw, but i would really love to!). would you like us to meet some time? my treat. (now, that’s really creepy!)
once a blogger will be always a blogger.
i know you will come back so i’ll just stay here and wait until that time comes. enjoy your break!
i hope you will be blogging again soon. (: some of your meaningful post has motivate me alot.
all the best for you. (: i will be waiting for the new you yeah? haha
I sincerely with all my heart and soul do wish that I have the courage to just say fuck ya’ll fuck the world i’m just going to do whatever the hell I want and if you think my actions don’t subscribe to your rigidly-prescribed dogma or principles in life then go find another blog to read and leave me alone while I actually have a guilt-free life. peace out. ————> HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! ROFL!!!! LOL!!! LMAO!!!! LOL!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!