Raya is here!

Thought I’ll write a short post telling you all that I HAVE REPLIED COMMENTS IN THE PREVIOUS TWO POSTS!!!

WOOT! It’s an achievement for me because I’ve been a very very bad blogger and have stopped replying to comments since I started teaching. I remember the old Suet would reply to every comment thoughtfully because I know every reader has put a lot of thoughts in writing his/her comment as well. The old Suet also has tons of time at her disposal which I don’t now T__T

Someone mentioned that he really misses the pre-cikgu suet posts and I could not have agreed to it more. I miss my old blogger self too. Aside from my vain, narcissistic side, I thought I was a lot more outgoing, chill and fun too. Now I’m so serious and boring! Yeah I’m inspiring now but I feel so grown up! I feel like I don’t have a personality anymore where else I used to think that I was a person with lotsa character (chehhhh perasan)

It’s funny though, because I feel like I’m really my old silly self when I’m in front of my kids. I would dance (yes -___-), sing off-key (cause I’m tone deaf), tell very very stupid jokes and am generally very stupid with them. But because my blog is public, I feel soooo constrained with my thoughts and writing. I can’t be my true self (true self is actually quite bimbotic) for fear of being judged as not being a good educator. Truth is, why should your ability to teach and how good a teacher you are be measured by the personality you exhibit? Is there only one type of person who can be a good educator?

When people found out that I’m a teacher (people who know I have a blog and who have seen my blog – but don’t necessarily know me), they are genuinely surprised that someone as vain and bimbotic as me can be a teacher. So I post pictures online, so I like makeup and wrote about clothes, does that mean I’ll be a bad teacher/role model to kids? The society is so harsh that it scares me. A person’s substance, intelligence, level of perseverance and heart should never be judged based on how much she cares about her looks.

Vanity and intelligence are not mutually exclusive. So my blog used to have a lot of pictures of myself, but I’ve also written many many many deep and thought-provoking posts. How come people don’t take the time to read those first before jumping to conclusion on who they think I am. I’m perceived as shallow and superficial, but not taking the time to read beyond the pictures makes them worse.

I meant for this to be a short one paragraph post but I’ve gotten very rambly :/

I think it’s because I have nothing to prepare for tomorrow! Everyone is in Raya mood already and I’m actually really excited for my 10-day break as well! Though I think 10 days for this is a little too long and we have to replace back some days for Saturday classes anyways.

Anyway, have a good Raya break and Selamat Hari Raya to all my Muslim readers! In my ongoing effort to foster a better relationship with the other teachers, I’ve bought a few jars of Raya cookies -___- The staff room has turned into a bakery these days and we have all kinds of cookies left right center. I’m really excited to be opening them up and to be able to eat them in public after Raya! Haha.

 

400 comments

  1. kei says:

    i never thought u were incapable of being a teacher when i never knew you in real life, and even if u posted vain pics i’d still be super inspired by you! and yes, super annoying how people perceive looks/vanity mutually exclusive to intelligence. like since when is making an effort about self-presentation a bad thing lolol in fact all professionals should be vain in making an effort to look good!

  2. ccc says:

    let me check later whether you replied to my comments…

    the day when i arrived at your blog, was june last year, for a reason i arrived at your entry about b*rry… 🙁

    how i wish you are my teacher (i must have said this many times, i think), i feel so insufficient! quietly searching ‘vanity’, ‘narcissistic’, at least you Are my teacher indirectly. it’s good.

    ccc.

  3. ef.ae says:

    funny ending to a thoughtful post! haha… you make me miss raya cookies too! it’s a such a norm that people will ask around if we cann purchase cookies when near raya or cny! man, i miss cookies!

    whatever you blog, you have your rights, it’s your blog but whatever ppl think you can never control..

    like the saying goes..

    you can’t make everyone like you. you don’t even like everyone yourself.

    right? ^^

  4. John says:

    I’ve never fooled anyone. I’ve let people fool themselves. They didn’t bother to find out who and what I was. Instead they would invent a character for me. I wouldn’t argue with them. They were obviously loving somebody I wasn’t – Marilyn Monroe

    I dont know you personally (perhaps?) and I can only make assumptions of you based on what you let us see and read. You haven’t changed, cirumstances has; and whatever you are doing, you are doing great.

  5. yuhhui says:

    i guess that’s the scary part about making a blog public. What we write will always be judged. Somehow if girls post pictures of themselves, talk about make up etc, we’re perceived as shallow and bimbotic. I don’t understand that mentality though. Isn’t it normal for girls to talk about these stuff? It’s better than gossiping anyway. lol.
    Anyway, i think you’re doing a good job by going for teach for malaysia. From what i know, it’s not easy getting into it. Apparently your grades must be good, certain skills are required etc. They don’t just choose any tom dick and harry into the program. So yeah, just continue blogging like how you blogged last time. Just be yourself. I miss reading all the old posts. =)

  6. JH says:

    I enjoyed reading your pre-cikgu posts. But now, I love even more to read your cikgu stories, on how you’ve changed into a more mature, patient and inspiring person! 😀 Everybody change in a little in different phases of their life. Society just sees a part of it. So, don’t worry so much & just be yourself! 😀 Happy Raya & enjoy your holiday WOOHOO!

  7. Tiff says:

    LOL I FEEL STALKER MAX but was reading through an old post and saw this.. Aha and thought that you sort of pretty much got your secret ambition. :p

    Patricia says:
    November 18, 2008 at 1:36 pm
    what do u secretly want to be (as in profession)

    suet: eh someone asked me the same thing edi. ok i give u a different answer. i really wanna be a kindergarten teacher

  8. silent reader says:

    Hi, I’ve been a silent reader since you’ve become a TFM fellow 🙂 I agree that society is extremely harsh today especially with info. about what we used to do, or what we wear, how we look etc., readily available just with a quick Google search.

    I have the utmost respect for what you do each day but do remember to have some fun, which I can see you do already with your classroom antics! Keep up the good work and thank you for contributing to society the way you do.

    Selamat Hari Raya!

  9. Erlinda says:

    I used to blog about anything under the sun, but since I became a teacher I realized my students stalked my blog. They started calling me using my blog name and started discussing things I posted on the blog. I was so worried that I blogged about things which are inappropriate for kids! I immediately deleted some posts and changed the way I blog so as to make it suitable for readers from all ages. =.=’

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