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2013, the year that was

I don’t know why it took me 3 days into 2014 to write this post but here it is!

2013 had been an amazing year, and I dare say, the best year I’ve ever had in my 25 years of life. I went through a tremendous amount of ups and downs in that one year alone, and I feel like I’ve overcome and accomplished the most in that year. I’ve dug out a lot of pictures to talk about my 2013!

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I started cooking a lot last year cause I found out that I have high cholesterol (7.6 – normal is below 5.0, this is considered dangerously high). I had a shock of my life when the doctor said I will get my first heart attack when I’m 40 if I don’t take care of myself. So yeah I started cooking, eating healthier and exercising. The latter has failed miserably though T___T

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In March, my choral speakers showed me that determination and passion were more important than the trophy. This year we didn’t win the championship despite working crazily hard but we went home very happy indeed. My kids never ceased to make me very proud :)

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I found ways to better manage my challenging class. I started reading to them story books and they really enjoyed it!

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Voted for the first time :D :D :D

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Had my second teacher’s day where this kid who never paid attention in class surprised me with a gift. He also told me that he came that day just so he could give me the gift, and that he wrote the note himself.

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Wept in class for the first time in 2013 and it was the hardest I’ve ever cried in class/school. A kid I’ve put a lot of effort and faith in told me to go to hell after a particularly difficult day in class. I lost my cool and punished everyone by making them write essays after essays. I later said sorry to a few good students and a girl wrote this back to me.

I feel like I failed this particular student though, since shortly after she left school and never came back. She’d lost interest because she kept falling further and further behind and I couldn’t do anything to help her. I lost a lot of my kids this way and it made me lose faith in a lot of things.

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Sat in class alone for hours just thinking of the fate of my students and thinking and rethinking of different ways to help them. This is the place where I’ve learned the art of reflection.

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Started a reading program where I fundraised RM 10,000 to get thousands of books for my students!

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Found little joys that continued to give me strength to go to school with zest and optimism everyday.

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Wore a saree for the first time!

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Wore a tudung for the first time too! Haha

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Met the most beautiful baby in the world and discovered how much this tiny being has changed my best friend’s life.

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Also discovered how much my boyfriend loves babies :D

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For my birthday this year, my students pretended to ignore me THE ENTIRE DAY and got me so sad before they surprised me with a cake during extra class!

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We also worked really really hard, for days and nights, for their PMR.

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Brought my kids to KL for the weekend and was so humbled by their genuine appreciation for everything in life.

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Fighter grew to become a happy chubby healthy baby :D

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Was given the opportunity to be featured in a documentary on my life as a teacher!!!!

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Did a play with my kids, which was the most strenuous and challenging thing ever especially when the kids don’t speak English AT ALL. But they did it!! Super duper proud of them!

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My kids helped me pack and I bade farewell to them and the school, the people and place that had taught me so much more than I’d expected.

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Also said goodbye to the books that all my readers have donated to me. THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT GUYS!!!! <3

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Said a very difficult goodbye to a student I’ve had the privilege to work with (he was the conductor in my choral speaking team and was the sole reason why we’d won so many times). I’m mocking him here for crying cause I don’t want to cry myself haha. He sobbed really hard when saying goodbye to me and my heart broke and I knew I’d be in such a gooey mess too.

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Went to the paddy field for the last time ever and teared thinking of my two years here. I never knew how attached I’d grow to this place and how much I’d love a place so different from what I’m used to and so far from my own comfort zone.

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Went to Cambodia for the first time and really loved it!

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Saw myself crying on TV hahaha not very flattering!

 
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Went back to school to see my kids when they get their PMR results. They did really well!! (though we didn’t reach our big goal, but we really did aim for the stars!) This year, we got the most number of As in English in the history of my school, ever!!!

That’s all for my 2013. It’s been an amazing year and I have so many people to thank for making it so awesome.
Thank you to my parents and friends for believing in me, thank you to Karthik for without him I couldn’t have gone through these two difficult years, to my students for showing me how to love unconditionally, to my readers for the constant encouragement, to everyone out there who had donated me books, stationery, printer, projector, postcards and money and had strengthened my faith in humanity, to Teach For Malaysia and my school for the opportunity to make a difference, and to all teachers out there who continue to persevere and labor their love day after day for years!

I’m so thankful I chose to start this chapter in my life and although I will no longer be teaching as of now, I know for a fact that this is a chapter I will never close and will get back to writing in the near future.

Happy new year everyone!

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The once in a lifetime opportunity

Sorry I’ve been missing again! I went to Cambodia two weeks ago and had an AMAZING time, which I promise I’ll talk about soon cos it’s so amazing I want everyone to go there!

Anyway, while I was away, the documentary came out! THANK YOU SO MUCH to people who watched it that day!!!! But I know a lot of people will not have the opportunity to watch it since it’s on a weekday night so here’s the link to watch it online:

http://www.tonton.com.my/#/home/channels/ntv7/magseven_2013_f7d56dd54bbf4edcadc8a17700de76a8/episode_39_e40a07ef8472441ca27fa17700de7c6f
(It’ll probably link you to the homepage if you’re using your phone, so search for magseven and it’s titled “episode 39, magseven 2013″)

Unfortunately, I can’t upload the video on youtube due to copyright issues, so you’ll have to watch it on tonton.my. The sucky part is you’d have to sign in but you can use my account if you want! (username: sweatlee, pswrd: sweatlee)

Tell me what you think of it! Some parts’ voiceover are done in the studio so it sounds a bit different. And yes, don’t have to tell me I look fat and have a lot of pimples, I’m aware of that! For some reason, people think I don’t know and find it crucial to point them out wtf. I barely have time to put on makeup for this T___T REALLY not easy to be a teacher.

Alright I hope you’ll like it! And I’m really happy that all the students featured here did really well for their PMR too!! :D

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Thank You Teacher promo video

I was very very fortunate to be approached by NTV7 a few months ago to do a documentary on a teacher’s life. The producer for the show interviewed me early last year for Malaysia Hari Ini and thought it’ll be nice to do a longer feature!

Honestly I’ve been super stressed up about this since the filming took about two weeks (spanned over a few different months) and already I was super busy in school. But I’m glad I did it cause it pushed me to try harder for my kids and of course I could also use it as an incentive.
“Do better cause you’ll be on TV! Do you want your family and friends to see you not putting in your absolute best??” and it REALLY worked!

It’ll be shown on NTV 7, 7.30 pm, next Tues 10 DEC. The promo is out for it too!

I won’t be here next week (going to Cambodia for a week!!) so let me know how it goes :)

p.s: yes I cried A LOT during filming hahaha. Emotional lah this teacher.

p.p.s: please ignore my fat face and pimples T__T

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My kids’ first trip to KL

HELLOOOOOO

I miss my blog! And my readers! (anyone still reading? haha)

Truth is I really really want to start blogging actively again but you know what happens when someone stops exercising for a long time, they just get super lazy. Even when I’m relatively free now because of the school holidays, I much prefer just posting on facebook/instagram instead.

BUT! I want to blog more often again since having them on here is a much better archive than on other social media platforms. So here goes!

It’s been a pretty crazy month since I last blogged. In fact it’s been a SUPER crazy two years since I last blogged actively (a post a month doesn’t quite summarize how it had been). I’ve fallen so much that my knees are all scraped and bruised now, but I’ve also been picked up by numerous people along the way that has made this journey more tolerable for me.

So let’s see, where do I begin? I think I’ll start slowly, by posting bit by bit on things I’ve been wanting to talk about. I’ve even thought of writing more personal stuff so I’ll put them in protected posts and send the passwords to those who subscribed last time! But scared they don’t read my blog anymore and I’ll be spamming people >.>

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I started the above three days ago and got distracted by things and forgot to continue T___T HOW lah like this.

I was mainly distracted by this:

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Haih so cute how to abandon him to blog instead?? Since I’m so free, I’ve been camping at Aud’s place to help take care of baby Jude (aka Fighter) and he’s become soooo adorableeeee! He now knows how to stare at you with big round adoring eyes and knows how to smile to melt all your worries away!

Speaking of adorable, let me tell you about the time I brought two of my students home for the weekend! Actually I feel so lazy talking about it on my blog cause I’ve already talked about it on my facebook/instagram/twitter. How to feel semangat to blog with the existence of bite-sized social media??

Anywayyyy, so I’ve always wanted to do this before I stop teaching. Early in the year, I told the kids that one of the rewards for doing well and showing improvement in class is a trip to KL and I’m glad that my mentor, Sawittri, organized an outing for us so that I finally have a reason to bring the kids back!

Honestly, I REALLY didn’t want to do so at first. Of course it’ll be nice for the kids but at the same time, I wasn’t sure if I was ready to mix my kampung cikgu and my urban city girl’s lives together. I’d have to bring them back to stay in my house for 3 days and they’d follow me everywhere you know!

But I’m so glad I did it because I know for a fact that they will remember this for life.

First of all, it’s because I chose the two students who have NEVER been to any city before, much less KL. They both come from challenging backgrounds and are still one of my best students ever. One of the girls’ family cannot even afford spending RM 46 for school trips so all 7 siblings have never been to KL before. When I told them about this trip, they couldn’t sleep for nights (reported by their families hahaha) and were so excited!

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This is when they got to my house and I gave them ice cream. They spent the next 30 mins or so just watching the pool and commenting on everything that’s happening. SO ADORABLE LIKE CRAZY!

You know, coming from the city and from a more privileged background, I don’t think I’ve met anyone quite like these kids. Not just these two girls but most of my kids in general. They are extremely extremely respectful, caring, helpful and humble. Everytime I think about them, I always feel like I’m the one who is so incredibly lucky to have met them.

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We went to 1utama that night with my family and walked around!

The next day, we went to FRIM for jungle trekking! Not really anything new for them since the jungle to them is like a “kebun” behind their houses hahaha

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Then we had scrumptious food at Hotel Armada! It’s their first time at a buffet so it was really overwhelming at first. Doesn’t help that I forced them to try food like pasta (hated it), sushi and wasabi (they almost puked lollll), and mint ice cream (TEACHER why the ice cream got angin?? HAHAHA)

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But I think they did enjoy getting to eat as much as they want :) I know I did *glutton wtf

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Then we went to the TFM office in KL Sentral!

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“WOW teacher, your office can see the whole city! We want to work here when we are adults too!”

You have no idea how much I want you to be able to do that too when you grow up..

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We went to KLCC next using the LRT and it was my kids’ first time on a train. They were very very impressed and it made me feel sad a little that I hardly use the train now and always resorted to driving instead.

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I’m like their paparazzi lol.

Made them order the drinks on their own (in English!) if they want me to pay for it.

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Finally, the magnificent KLCC!

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We had dinner at the food court (cause I’m quite broke haha) but wow, I didn’t expect my kids to enjoy it that much. They couldn’t stop raving about the sizzling noodle and the variety of food and it just made me feel like I’ve really taken things for granted these days.

Heck, the whole trip was such a humbling experience for me honestly.

When I asked the kids how was their sleep, the first thing they said was how comfortable and nice the mattress is.

When I asked them what their favourite part of the trip was, they said they loved walking around the mall and eating ice cream with my family.

When I offered to buy them gifts, the first things they bought are all for their families first. And then they didn’t want to get anything for themselves to help me save money.

Where to find kids like this these days??

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Around 10 pm, after 14 hours of being out, I asked the kids if they were tired.

“No lah teacher, I usually sleep at 1 am!”

“Yeah I sometimes sleep at 3 am you know!”

Barely 3 minutes into our car ride home, they fell into a deep slumber all the way till we reached home hahahha

The next day when we had to leave to go back to our village, they were SO SO SO sad and promised they’ll come back here again and will study really hard. I have complete faith that they will not let me (and themselves) down :)

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In my next post, I’ll talk about my last trip to my village and the whole week of farewell with my kids (super emotional one haha). Stay tuned wtf

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Alas

It took me two years to see changes in this one boy but I think I’ve finally seen a glimpse of that elusive light at the end of the tunnel today!

This boy is pretty good in English but he is so super stubborn and refused to do homework for the two years I’ve taught him. He slept in class, was never on task and ignored my consequences. When asked, he said he just doesn’t care that much about English.

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The crumpled paper on the left was submitted by him a few months ago, after much force and as you can see, he did it very grudgingly.

I don’t know what I did or why he suddenly turned around, but he finished his homework for the first time last month and when I read it, it was actually really good! I read it out in class and was all praises when he finally admitted that he used google translate.

Well….the fact that he even cared enough to google translate was enough for me. T___T (tears of joy)

But things started getting better! I told him I know he can write it well even without help and the week after, he submitted his essay (the one in the middle, written in pencil) and proudly announced to the class that he didnt use google translate this time!

I corrected it immediately and told him I’ll use it to put in the showcase file for this class, but I need him to correct it first and rewrite it in pen. Give it to me next week, I said. No, I’ll give it to you tomorrow, he said.

True enough, tada! I got it the next day. I read it a little; it was flawless and beautiful and was written so neatly and look at that amount of words!!!! Tears were streaming inside me but when he gave it to me, I said coolly, “I hope there are no silly mistakes this time”
To which he replied, “if there are I’ll rewrite it right now”

T__________T *clouds parting *birds singing *harps playing in the background

I swear I died and went to heaven right at that moment. But of course I had to stay alive so I can write about it here wtf

Why oh why did you wait two years to do this?? Right before I leave?? *holds his shoulders and shakes him for answer

But I know exactly what his reply would be. “Better late than never, teacher”
(To clarify, I’ve used all kinds of techniques with this kid. Affirmation, praises, calling home, home visits, disciplinary punishments, serious talks about future, begging on knees, kind words etc, NOTHING has ever worked. But then again, it could be a combination of all these that finally worked. Gosh I don’t know, it’s so hard to tell sometimes with kids! I just hope he keeps this up)

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Monday Blues

Behold, a sight never before seen in the history of this class and for as long as I’ve taught them (2 yrs). They were all seated, participated in the activities and completed all the work on the board! I told them I’ll take a picture to keep as proof that they too can be successful.

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They felt happy that they are now “good” students, but what they don’t know is how incredibly far they are from where they need to be. Two years on, I’m still using standard 3 exercises for them and they STILL can’t do them. No amount of colorful posters, engaging activities, interesting teaching aids, house visits or incentives have helped push them forward. 

I now have a month left with them and though I still have hope that I can still push them a little tiny bit more (if they continue to behave), I know realistically that I’ve failed to close the gap for them. 

I know Rome was not built in a day, but I had no idea coming in that it would be this incredibly difficult. We’re constantly working in an environment where there are just so so so many factors preventing these kids from succeeding. 

Feels like i’m trying to get birds to learn how to swim, upstream, with sharks and crocs everywhere, only to realize that I too, don’t know how to swim myself. 

I’m so close to the end, and yet I’m still an eternity away from any real success with them.

 

p.s: I know this post is a little depressing, but I wanted to paint the most accurate picture of how I feel/how things are. Things are not always inspiring and hopeful, in fact, I feel mostly useless and unaccomplished most times. Le sigh.

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The value of knowledge

The question we struggle the most this year as second year fellows is this:

How do we know if we’ve even made a difference?

The issue of impact measurement is very real, because what’s the point of us working so hard when we can’t even quantify to anyone what we have done?

Sadly, I’m feeling incredibly depressed these days because my kids who will be taking PMR this year did not do very well in their trials. In fact, their results dropped SIGNIFICANTLY for their trials. Granted, the questions are more difficult, but that’s still no excuse for them to not do well.

I’ve been thinking and rethinking this question of impact again and again. I promised myself and the kids that if we work hard enough, we will reach our target. Our target is 20 of the 32 students in that class will get A for PMR English. This is a super duper big goal because there had only been 4/5 As in English so far every year in the history of my school.

As of right now, we only have 1 student who has been consistently getting an A in English. ONE. And I’m aiming for TWENTY. *nervous chuckle

So in terms of quantifiable data, I guess I have none whatsoever to show that I’ve been a useful contributing member of the school. My weak kids are still weak, my good kids are still not great. I can literally feel the scalding of the judging look in every teacher’s eyes in the school.

“Why is this girl so silly, working so hard making beautiful posters and staying late giving extra classes when she has achieved no progress at all in their results?”

But today, my hope in myself is somewhat renewed.

I know I’ve achieved little to nothing in terms of quantifiable results, but I’d like to think that some of the impact I’ve made that can hardly be quantified are what’s most important. These are things that I cannot put in charts and graphs to show how much progress my kids have shown, or things that I cannot sell in my interview with future employers.

But essentially, these are things that keep me going on painful days, and things I will remember forever when reminiscing my days as a teacher.

One of the values that I really want my kids to internalize is the importance of having big dreams. When I first met my kids, they can never articulate what their dreams are to me. To them, getting 8As in PMR is important because..well..it’s just good to get a lot of As. They can’t tell me why the As is a ticket out for them, or why the pursuit of knowledge in itself is incredibly valuable.

After the poor exam results, I got them to write about their big dreams again and to write why getting this A is important in achieving their dreams.

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Most of them could articulate very easily what their big dreams are, and I’m glad they’ve been quite specific as opposed to just writing “I want to find a good job” or “I want to be a doctor”.

I’ve also had people coming to speak to them about what they can do, hence the Oxford University! (Thanks Melissa!)

(sorry please excuse their grammar/spelling errors)

BUT!

The best part are these notes.

Last week, I got them to write about their dreams for the children of Malaysia. At first they were like “hahhh dreams againnnn!” But once they started writing, they got so into it! Here are some of the most inspiring ones:

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This kid is super amazing. Notice that he wrote at the bottom: PMR Victim, Edy (his name). HAHA!

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Love how they kept asking the kids to dream big :)

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Can’t believe she still remembers the video I showed them after coming back from India!

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This is my absolute favourite. My job is done here!

After realizing that it’s very incredibly difficult to see huge progress in their exam results, mainly due to me being an inexperienced teacher and the circumstances, I’m so glad that they’ve taken something from me in my two years teaching them. I hope they never ever forget the value of education and will continuously pursue knowledge when I’m no longer there.

Other things that make me very happy:

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Kids preparing the board for me even before I came into class. The standard stuff Teacher Suet Li always writes: Day and date, agenda of the day, WARNING board, and kids who are absent.

Love my kids! (only when they’re not naughty heh)

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I never ever ever ever never ever would have imagined this sight in a million years (yes I’m being dramatic). Most of you would probably recognize this girl as Jaya, the girl who cannot even read one-syllable words (“the”, “she”) in the beginning of last year.Since we’ve started on the Sponsor A Child To Read program, she’s been coming to the reading sessions every week without fail. Last week, she asked if she could bring her siblings along. I thought she’d only bring her sister along, but she brought her ENTIRE family. Two brothers (13, 18) and two sisters (15, 8 ). And guess what? All of them can’t read (English) as well.

But here she is, patiently teaching her 8 year-old sister how to read one of the books donated by you guys. She herself probably could only read a third of the words in the book, but the confidence in her voice was remarkable. I still can’t believe that happened and I really really REALLY hope that even if the books may not be able to change Jaya’s literacy level right now, it will help change her sister’s.

One small tiny step at a time! #oneday

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Before the holidays, tons of kids came over to get books from my mini library! THIS SIGHT MADE ME CRY TEARS OF JOY!!!!

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Postcards from all over the world :) Keep them coming guys! My kids love reading about different parts of the world and your short inspiring stories!

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Unrelated to teaching but I went rock climbing for the first time during the holidays! It was a lot more challenging than I’d imagined it to be but so much fun!

That’s all for today’s (or this month’s, haha) update. I have tons of other stuff to write about but shall pace myself so I have more materials to blog more often.

p.s: I already got a job for next year! Will not be talking about it too much for now but yays!

p.p.s: I have a MASSIVE surprise to share but will not be sharing it now until it’s somewhat been confirmed. YAYS! (super anticlimatic hahaha)

1,051

Is Okey

I wrote this on my Facebook a while ago and completely forgot to put it here too!

I never thought I’ll face this moment again this year, but…today, I crumbled. Every part of me shattered into a million pieces at the start of class and I couldn’t glue them back even till after the bell rang.

I entered my challenging class today with so much enthusiasm because I’ve prepared hard for it and I know that despite it being the last two periods, I WILL succeed today.

Barely 10 mins in, everything started falling apart. They kept talking and interrupting my lesson and after I told them that we will do some fun activities with the newspaper, they said they don’t want to do anything but sleep. I was mad but tried encouraging them further anyway.

“Ala teacher leave us alone! stop making us do anything!”

That was the last straw for me.

I took all the newspapers, walked out and threw them in the trash can. Students stopped talking and stared at me nervously. I took my mahjong paper filled with pictures and colorful papers out from the board very dramatically, folded them slowly and put them back in my box *dramaqueen

Then, what transpired next was probably the longest hour of our lives. I just wrote and wrote essays after essays on the board for them to copy. My chalk finished and I went to the next class to borrow some and continued writing. That’s what other teachers do and if they don’t want to enjoy my class filled with simple fun activities then I’ll do the same too.

Kids began complaining and whenever they did, I wrote their names under WARNING and they immediately kept quiet. All 28 kids wrote three 200-word essays in silence till the bell rang, all but one boy.
Before letting them go, I’ve calmed down so I told them that if they don’t want to learn the nice way next time, it’ll be essay time again. Most of them apologized for their behaviors and left.

I told that boy who slept through the class to stay behind to do the essays. He said no he won’t. I pulled a chair and sat next to him “I won’t leave till you do”. Then, nonchalantly, he took his bag from me and walked out of class while muttering “don’t waste my time”.

Dumbfounded, I choked back angry tears and just sat and stared at his empty book for 30 mins, wondering what else can I do with this boy whom I’ve put SO much effort in for months cause he’s always been difficult. I started tearing because I know I’ve completely lost the battle with him. I give up, you win.

Then, I went to pack my things and saw this on a girl’s desk. During the whole dictatorial copy-this-down stint, I’d slipped this note to students who were good and who wanted to learn. I felt so bad that they had to endure this because they didn’t do anything wrong. She wrote this in reply and left it on her table for me to see.

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When I saw it I just broke down like crazy and started crying and crying. I’ve already taught this class for almost two years and I’m leaving soon and I have no idea if they’ve learned anything from me. There are so many of them who wanted to learn but I’ve completely disappointed them today. Tears were just streaming down my face. Angry tears for my failures, sad tears for my kids’ future, frustrated tears for my wasted efforts, and relieved tears for this girl who did not give up on me.

Seriously, how the hell did movies like Dangerous Minds and Freedom Writers make things look soooo easy??
Thank you Rekka, I will get through this for kids like you. ‪#‎isokey‬

UPDATE: At 8pm the night after this incident, I had my first night reading session. Guess who showed up?
Yes. The boy who told me not to waste his time. He lives pretty far away and got his dad to send him anyway. He said he was just too tired in school and that he wants to learn now.

KIDS, STOP PLAYING WITH MY FRAGILE HEART T_______T

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Dear Iqmal,

Sometimes I feel kids like you exist to make my life a living hell, but I know the truth is you have made me a stronger teacher and person. I remember when I first met you last year, with your big smile and eager eyes and you calling out for help every 5 seconds. And that moment when you excitedly waited for me by the road side with your pressed shirt and clean jeans for me to bring you back to read Peter and Jane together. You couldn’t even read the first word in the first book, which was Peter, but remember how you tried and tried the entire night?

I also remember, very vividly, you coming into my house stinking of cigarette smell in your breath and the look of defiance in your eyes when I nagged at you. But you kept coming anyway and you kept trying to read book 1A.

We made little to no progress last year and this year seemed to be getting worse for us. You started acting out in class, crawling on the floor to disrupt the lesson and you screaming your high-pitched voice. I know you never meant to hurt my feelings and I know you know I still care for you because you would do my work if I paid you one-on-one attention, but somewhere along the line, we both knew we were not getting anywhere.

Honestly, I was really so close to giving up on you. But last week, you were one of the very few boys from your class who came during Teacher’s Day. Shocked, I asked you why you came, and you said “saya datang nak jumpa teacher”. Then you, you little rascal you, waited for everyone to leave and took out a box wrapped with crumpled giftwrap and gave it to my shyly.

The thought of you sitting down wrapping the gift the night before, the thought of you finding ways to write that note IN ENGLISH, the thought of you cutting out that heart and pasting it carefully on the note, all that in contrast with thoughts of me wanting to give up on you.. just breaks my heart.

Dear Iqmal and the rest of the kids in that class,

I promise I will try harder each day and not give up on you. I will make you better people, even if you still can’t read by the end of this year. You will believe in yourself because you know there was once a teacher who always believed in you. This last line will sound cheesy as hell, but the reason why I’m on this path now is to be taught the meaning of humility, patience and grit by people like you.

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May you marry me?

Today, this boy who is really cheeky but has never really spoken English in class came to me at the end of class, having mustered all the courage his small 14 yr old body can contain.

“Teacher I ask two questions. Can I help carry the box and may you marry me?”

Sigh even after 2 years, they’re still trying their luck hoping I’ll eventually say yes some day. Oh well at least he spoke English!

 

p.s: i know i’m being lazy with my blog, but I’ve truly been super occupied lately. School holidays just ended and I spent half the holiday at the beach and the other half preparing for interviews.

yes, it’s finally time to think about what I want to do after the fellowship! Sadly, I am not going to continue teaching in this current school I’m at now (due to many many reasons, nothing to do with my passion for teaching and the kids, obviously). The kids all know I’m leaving end of this year and have been giving me lots of excuses why I should stay. The best one is this:

“Teacher, I can’t wait to see you pregnant!”

“WHAT? WHY??”

“You know, we see teachers go from being single to married to being pregnant all the time. I’m sad I can’t see you pregnant. Will you stay here pleaseeee!”

Kids, sometimes I don’t know how much my heart can take the love I have for all of you.

Anyway I’m still looking for other avenues related to teaching, especially with younger kids so if you know anything, let me know!