Being an insomniac is so not funny anymore and I’m putting all the blame solely on my roommate. 1. cause I really think it is really her fault and 2. she doesn’t read my blog so putting the blame on her rather than myself makes things easier.
1. I never ever had problems falling asleep before till I got here. Before this, I can fall asleep almost whenever I want and I gracefully accept that as god’s gift to me wtf. BUT here, my roommate has some dunno what A.D.D and she takes some dunno what pill and does NOT sleep at all. One will think that she takes the pill to help her concentrate in doing her schoolwork but no! She takes it so she can play WARCRAFT the whole night. *faints
Therefore conclusion is, it disrupts my sleep greatly because I can hear her typing to her warcraft mates asking for sword or army wtf. So nevermind, I resort to asking Angie to donate her earplugs to me. Sleep came by easily for the next week or so until one day when I woke up and realized that they’re missing T____T
As you can see, I’m damn free wtf.
Sigh so nowadays I usually take an hour or more to fall asleep even when I’m really tired and sleepy and even when said culprit is not even playing warcraft. It’s like I’m already used to not being able to fall asleep. Long ago when I could fall asleep anytime, I just had to start talking to myself (not aloud la) and the moment when my thoughts became incoherent, that was when sleep would engulf me completely. I would then not fight its possession over me and let myself be consumed totally by it. It was bliss.
But that was long long time ago. Now I can talk to myself forever and without knowing it, the sun will be up and I’ll still be talking to myself.
Example of conversation with myself:
Ok time to sleep! I’m soooo tired yawn.
*blinks 35 times and pretends to yawn again
I’m really tired! and sleepy! I can sleep anytime soon! YAWNNN
Oh I didn’t crack my waist, no wonder I can’t fall asleep! I must crack my waist before I sleep everynight!
*twists body in awkward angle to left, and to right.
*still wide awake
OHHH I forgot to crack my knuckles (fingers and toes)! Silly me!
*cracks every single crack-able part of my body
Hmm what shall I eat tomorrow..Shit did I finish my homework?!?!!$@ Oh I did fuh.
*40 minutes later
OHH I forgot to meditate that’s why can’t fall asleep! Ohm…ohm.. namo tassa bhagavato arahato sammasambudhasa ohm..(WTF why i still remember this)
*60 minutes later
T____________T Why am I still awake I hate myself got class at 8am tomorrow lahhh T__T looks like I have no choice but to skip my morning class. Case resolved.
*falls asleep peacefully
Sigh that’s basically how it is for me EVERY single night. But of course the conversation goes on longer than that. I’ll think of everything think-able like what to blog, what to wear tomorrow, if I should go mall or not, how many days I haven’t shat already, why didn’t I eat vege, why is the sky blue, why did the chicken really cross the road, seriously lah everything imaginable. It’s a wonder why I never ran out of things to think about one lor when it comes to this.
Really really suffering man. Somemore I’m running out of things to ohm with when I meditate. *reminds self to google Buddhist Chants wtf. Last time when I went Buddhist school wtf I damn pro at the whole bhagavato thing one.